Published On: December 1, 2009

Doctor, Doctor 1

There were over 20 (and possibly close to 30) THINGS stuck to me and they expected me to sleep. But, then, when you have sleep apnea, falling asleep isn't usually the problem, it's staying asleep that gets sticky. I pulled my results from that test and I basically stopped breathing 12 times in 6 hours, for up to 20 seconds, and had 231 periods of shallow or labored breathing for up to 30 seconds. And, of course, the snoring was loud (the nurse ranked it a 9 out of 10) and all of this was caused by an obstruction somewhere in my airway. The first option was a CPAP machine, which I did wear for several months. But between the lines it left on my face and feeling like I was wearing an elephant mask at night, I opted for surgery when my next check-up came around...

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I'm only 33 but I've had an interesting time of things, health-wise, since I was 17 and they suspected I had osteoarthritis in my hips (I didn't, but that's another story that took 3 years to sort out). Thankfully almost everything falls in the "annoying, could be worse" category and, well, you just get to a point where you have to laugh about it. It's one of the few areas of my life I haven't put under the comic microscope and I figured now would be as good a time as any.

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